When your granddaughter sends you a text wondering if you’ve ever written a blog about comparison, you answer…immediately. My thoughts: Comparison, the robber of joy and confidence. It holds hands with jealousy. It runs the deadly race of competition. Don’t come near my precious ones. You’re a liar and a thief.
I texted her back letting her know I’ve never done a post on comparison. I asked her if she’d have breakfast with me so we could talk about it. That was yesterday. Today we had breakfast. Her two siblings joined us. This was important to them and to me.
I wasn’t sure what to expect. They’re all highly successful young adults. All three, doing great in college, are committed to their studies, hard workers, with beautiful hearts. How could comparison ever be a struggle for any of them?
Over a delicious meal, they let me know how they, ages 22, 21, and 19, all viewed comparison and how each one found it affecting their lives.
We had some interesting dialogue. I woke up to the fact that many struggling with comparison, find the wrestle mainly within themselves. They compare their high standards with their performance, not measuring up to what they had hoped.
A profound thought: Comparison reveals what’s important to you.
We talked about the things some young adults grapple with—social media posts, (which doesn’t show everyone’s true self) high school and college grades, college acceptance and entrance, body image, clothes, popularity, personality of others—outgoing versus quiet, friends, job status, a more handsome or beautiful boyfriend, girlfriend, husband, or wife. The list goes on. One of my grands said, “It’s a disease that’s known to all.”
I shared with them some of my cautions––and my concerns prompted this post. I want to sound the alarm: If young adults don’t kick this plaguing tendency out of their lives, it most likely will follow them right into adulthood, marriage, the workplace, and even parenting—comparing your children to those of other family members and friends. Your poor kids—don’t do it to them! While comparison is common to mankind, it’s a thief and a robber, stealing one of the most valuable character qualities you can ever possess: the quality of contentment. Don’t allow yourself to be robbed! Here’s a challenge to all of us wrestling with comparison. We should consider these thoughts:
What’s really important to me. Make a list and keep it close.
“What is it I plan to do with my one wild and precious life?” (Mary Oliver)
Prayerfully think about that.
Recognize the importance and freedom of being comfortable in my own skin.
Embrace the joy found in this life-giving concept: “I’m Free to Be Me and Loving It.”
I want to share a wonderful word of truth today. God has a plan for each of us. We have the potential to make a difference in history by the way we live and the choices we make, which will change the outcome of eternity.
There’s nothing more exciting than to know we are in the center of His perfect will, living out His plans and purposes for our lives. I encourage you to stay focused on the Lord, allowing Him to open all the right doors. He will. It’s His promise.
No need to waste this one wild and precious life comparing ourselves to others! We can be comfortable in our own skin. What liberty we have in Jesus to be just that! On this journey together, Deb